Stephen’s Funny Ideas

Today’s dip into the spam archive yielded a mail from ‘Seawood Foradori’ with the title ‘trioecious’. (I looked trioecious up in the dictionary, and it means “a plant species that has individuals with staminate flowers, individuals with pistillate flowers, and individuals with perfect flowers”. Intriguing.)

Anyway, I decided to turn it into a story about a whimsical young gay man named Stephen Foradori. Stephen lives in a cottage close to the ocean with his friend Mrs. Ferrars. Despite his plans to be a fashion designer, he harbours controversial political beliefs about their town.

Stephen’s Funny Ideas

Stephen was sitting at the window gazing out at the ocean. The sea spread out as far as he could see, and there was a file of gray islets to the left. Across their endless links, Stephen mapped out his own life. He was going to become a fashion designer, and spent much of his time dreaming up new outfits.

His friend and living partner, Mrs Ferrars, appeared at his side wearing a red jacket, one of his latest creations.

“What do you think?” she asked, twirling a couple of times.

“It looks fantastic!” Stephen said. “Are you going to wear it to the banquet?”

“Yes, I think so,” Mrs Ferrars replied. The occasion referred to was a celebratory dinner for the town mayor, Raymond Seawood, who had recently been awarded an OBE. “You really think it suits me?” She brushed a speck of lint from the jacket’s lapel.

“Absolutely,” Stephen gushed. “It’s so you, Mrs Ferrars,”

“I want to make a good impression at the banquet,” she fussed. “Raymond can be so terse and blunt at times,”

“Don’t listen to him,” Stephen advised. He had no time for the notoriously grumpy village elder. However, it remained to be seen if Mrs Ferrars would ever truly stop admiring the man. “Darling, you have to remember…” he said. “This is, as yet, an incomplete society in decay,”

“Oh, you and your funny ideas!” Mrs Ferrars chuckled. “We hadn’t been here so very long before you started on your social theories!”

Suddenly, as she looked at Stephen, everything that had puzzled her became clear now in the light of the weak afternoon sun. Stephen, with his papers and files, and secretive behaviour… “He imagines governing this town and its masters!” she thought to herself. “He wants to step forward and become some sort of leader!

Stephen held out his coffee cup. “Make me another cup, would you?” He smiled innocently, and Mrs Ferrars wondered if she was mistaken. Maybe Stephen just wanted to get his picture in the paper. She went off to prepare his coffee without the addition of milk or sugar, which she knew he hated.

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